Dating Advice

Written by Australia's best dating coaches

The Importance of Dating Around  

There's nothing wrong with meeting new people

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In the words of Billie Holiday, “A kiss that is never tasted is forever and ever wasted.” With the hot thrills of dating, you’ll often crave to sample all the treats. This is not to say that you should gobble every desert on the table! Rather, you should select a variety of delights that interest you, and take the time to indulge in the individual flavors. When you discover a type that you genuinely like, you can then invest your time into nurturing that match.

When you date around, you get a valuable opportunity to understand more what you want and learn about your personal identity as a mate. Now you might be thinking, “wait a sec— Isn’t it sleazy to date multiple people at once?” Absolutely not!

There is definitely a stigma attached to dating multiple people because it’s often advised to focus on one individual at a time. Well, this is not necessarily a better approach. Firstly, you cannot always be certain that the person with whom you have decided to invest all your efforts is on the same page. As a result, you may be pursuing someone who is intent on blasting through her options instead of nesting with you. And that’s fine—many people prefer to browse without being a buyer. The only caution to exercise is knowing when to quit and to notice if the dates are about their needs than yours. If this is the case, you need to devise a smarter dating game plan. This means developing a more relaxed and flexible dating style that also allows you to exercise your options as well, instead of sacrificing your emotions all at once.


Now let’s look at the amazing benefits of experiencing many people at once.


Self discovery

By casually dating a few people, you’ll welcome more opportunities for self-discovery. During this process, you can date around and develop a stronger sense of what you like rather than rolling-over-backwards to be the right one for someone else. You can also learn to value yourself as a desirable and experienced dater. The bottom line is that you need to see the dating process as your opportunity to discover your needs and wants, and focus less on becoming what other people want. The more you learn about your personal dating goals and desires, the more confident you will become later on when choosing a potential mate.



Dating around will also help you appear more desirable to others. This is because the best way to sell yourself as a great catch is to act like one. So, if you want to be alluring to your dates, you should give the impression that you’re already leading a fulfilling life. Whether this means you’re occupied with some glamorous job or other dates, it does not really matter—just appear busy. While you may or may not actually have these diversions, you should always create the appearance of having them. You can create this illusion by pretending to have plans on certain days of the week or taking some time between text messages ( 20-30 minutes is reasonable). While this may seem silly, people who have successful and dynamic lives will usually be too distracted to respond immediately or always be ready for plans. Overall, this active image makes you more compelling and desirable to the opposite sex.



The last reason you should date around is quite simple: you can make new friends. Throughout your journey to find romance, you’ll see that not everyone clicks with you. Sometimes it can be nice to preserve friendships with these people because you can still share interests and experiences, inviting more happiness into your life. You should also remember that dates do not always have to be about sexual chemistry. Once in a while, it can just simply be fun to go out and enjoy drinks and solid conversation. Cheers!


With all these positive forces at work, there is no reason you should shy away from dating multiple people at once. Of course, when you meet that special one, you can consider slowing things down, but in the meantime, you need to explore. So, lay back and enjoy dating and all the great perks it has to offer! Dating around and scoping out different prospects create new and fresh experiences and we can use these moments to grow and learn more about ourselves as we muddle through the modern dating scene. Good luck and all the best!

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